Somebody, anybody tell Mary J. Blige to stop peddling “Real Love.” I love the song, but it hasn’t been a hit since the early 90s.
I don’t kno w… the timeline is fuzzy, but it felt like she was an Apple press conference — reminding us of how good she was before trying to sell us on how good she is.
But we came here to talk about dancing.
Rob Kardashian is safe. Ladies, you’re welcome!
Estelle sang “The Twist” and head judge Len Goodman danced it … well … sorta. His hip survived the performance and that’s all that counts. Also, Chubby Checker made a surprise appearance during his famous song. Nobody was more surprised than whoever had to get up and paint Mr. Checker’s jeans onto his body before he could go on television.
Even more confusion came a little later when Mary J. Blige came back to sing her new song but was dressed up like a 1989 Janet Jackson. I may or may not have put on my army boots and had a Rhythym Nation dance clinic in my living room. May or may not have.
And that is the exact reason that someone at ABC studios needs to pull the plug on giving DWTS any and all of the air time they want each week.
After the madness settled down, the badness emerged. How, in all things that are deemed holy, did Kristin Cavallari (also, why was her ex-fiance Jay Cutler in the audience?) and Hope Solo end up in the bottom two? Someone tell me how … I’ll wait.
Seriously, Chaz Bono can-NOT dance, should not be on the show any longer, and everybody knows it.
I’m pretty sure I even saw tears from Carrie Anne.
Kristin and Mark
Alas, Kristin was sent walking.
That’s what your voting does, America.