This is Capitals defenseman Mike Green’s rookie card. Yup, it looks like he is about to have a certain kind of “movement” on the ice. Possibly on his way to the face off circle. Yes, we have the maturity if 12 year olds and poop jokes make us laugh.

You may not want to keep going if you aren’t laughing too.

Tampa Bay Lightning goalie Darren Puppa was nicknamed “Poops”. This is not a joke. Not sure if that’s the reason that word is on this card or if it’s the Kraft Dinner’s fault.

OH MY GOD! MARIAN HOSSA IS ON FIRE! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEONE PUT HIM OUT!

In 1983, Steve Yzerman was a leprechaun. Or was using this opportunity to teach Canadian kids about near & far.

Patrik Stefan is laughing because even he can’t believe he was taken first overall in the 1999 Entry draft. Or he can see the future and saw this coming.