As we’re less than a week away from Christmas, I’m sure I’m not the only one scrambling to finish my shopping before the big day. It’s easy to get a tie for Dad, some gloves for Mom, and a calendar for your super-organized BFF, but what to get for the ultimate Gamecock superfan on your list? You know the one. The guy/girl who wears gamecock-embroidered pants and a plush Cocky hat everywhere, named their children Steve and Ray, and has USC wallpaper in their living room. What to get the person who has everything? Obviously not a jersey (duh, they own every color/player already). A Carolina car decal just won’t do, either (who doesn’t have one of those?). Fret not, panicked gift buyer, and allow me to share with you some…”unique” options.
1. 3″ Team Tackler Christmas Ornaments – Apologies to anyone who owns these, but they creep me out. If you’re on a budget, though, these might be a good option, as they come in a set of four and can be purchased for under $20 on Amazon and FansEdge. Just make sure the person receiving them isn’t prone to nightmares.
2. USC Desk Clock – This gift is nowhere near as odd as the first one. It’s apparently perfect for those who love both a Dabo Swinney-level of exclamation points and USC, though. Per Google Shopping, “A desk is only complete with the addition of this beautiful walnut finished desk clock! Whether the fan is a guy or a gal this is a gift that will be remembered as both practical and perfect! A fine brass and enamel medallion is tastefully mounted on the front adding a touch of color a show of loyalty and making this the most envied desk accessory in the office!” Buy it today, or risk your superfan having an incomplete desk!
3. Williams Brice Crystal Ball – Gaze into this crystal ball and see…the home of the Gamecocks! This 4” beauty comes with a lighted base and is either kind of cool or kind of weird, or maybe both. There are only three left in stock on Amazon, though, so purchase it quickly if they’re your preferred seller (it is available elsewhere).
4. Gamecocks Animated Dancing Musical Halfback Figure – Those creepy ornaments are nothing compared to this thing. I really can’t imagine why someone would create this in the first place, not to mention why any sane person would want such a thing. Then again, superfans aren’t always sane.
5. Washer Toss Game – According to the product’s description, “The Original” washer toss is one of the hottest games on the market. If your superfan friend or family member doesn’t have it, they’re obviously liable to be mocked for their clear loserdom. Be a good person and help them avoid that fate this holiday season.
6. Gamecocks Nutcracker – Anddddd the creepy gift items continue. Nutcrackers are frightening. I’m sorry if you own/like/make them, but they are. It’s not a bad gift idea, though, unless you’re giving it to someone who shares my feelings on nutcrackers. If that’s the case, opt for one of the other bizarre choices.
7. Stained Glass Helmet Light or Imitation Traffic Light – Well, really now, what home and/or office wouldn’t be complete without one or both of these? Because your favorite superfan likely already has at least one Gamecock lamp and helmet (probably signed), why not combine the two for a brand new piece of décor? If that’s not up your alley, then go for the traffic light, which could blink all day and night, annoying entertaining everyone present.
8. 3′ South Carolina Artificial Tree – Ah, the pièce de résistance of this whole list. To the non-USC fan, this tree looks like a candy cane. To the Gamecocks superfan, though, it’s a beautiful sight to behold, one which supremely showcases school spirit. Yes, the person you’re giving it to likely already has a tree, but no matter. I personally have two small artificial trees (both green, mind you) in my bedroom, so the more the merrier when it comes to trees, I say.Best of luck with all your shopping needs this holiday season – and if you or someone you know receives one (or more) of these items, or any others which could have made the list, please, please let the rest of us know about it.