The bloom may be off the Eovaldi rose. Or maybe, he was never a rose after all. Although Nathan Eovaldi came up throwing gas (that’s his calling card, after all), he also demonstrated that’s about all he could do. Tonight, he got tattooed for three runs, two of which were home runs. However, three runs is still not that many, so to return to my flower analogy, perhaps he’s more like a…tulip. Really pretty, but the wind totally messes it up.

Tolleson finally lived up to his hype by delivering two scoreless innings.

I need to work on this imagery thing.

Anyway, the Dodgers lost to the Phillies 3-2, despite the fact that Blanton is not that great of a pitcher. The Dodgers are now 2 games out of 1st place, which is currently occupied by the San Francisco Giants. The game was notable, though, for its TOOTBLAN demonstration. Shane Victornio attempted to steal third and then, for some reason, decided not to do that halfway there. So he got thrown out. Mark Ellis got called out for running out of the basepath as he tried to avoid being tagged by Carlos Ruiz – a tag, by the way, that wasn’t a tag, since Ruiz had the ball in his throwing hand and touched Ellis with his ball-less glove.

Notably, though, Shawn Tolleson pitched two perfect innings of relief.

Now, the big questions revolve around the trade deadline – will the new ownership group make a splash by bringing the Dodger fanbase a nice new pony to win our love – and Chad Billingsley, who was scratched from his most recent start with elbow tenderness. Two MRIs confirmed that it was elbow inflammation. Billingsley is set to start tomorrow, but I would not be surprised if someone from the minors, either Steven Fife or John Ely, is called up to take Billz’s place.

Regarding the trade deadline, though, it seems as those the Dodgers are in on everyone (and who can blame them), but hopefully, they will make sure not to overpay for someone performing above their head who is about to be a free agent (Dempster, I’m looking at you).

What. What was that? I was ready to write a celebratory post about how awesome it was that the Dodgers were back to winning, that the triumphant return of Kemp, Dre, and M. Ellis was continued with Andre’s bomb in the 6th to pull the Dodgers ahead and then…

…Jansen had a protracted encounter with Cameron Maybin

….Jansen finally struck him out.

…Jansen induces a pop up and then turned around to kick the mound

(I have been told by my pitcher boyfriend that baseball mounds routinely suck and need to be groomed by a cleat)

(I have also been told by my pitcher boyfriend that MLB mounds do not need this sort of self-maintenance)

…Jansen continued to look down at the mound, presumably deciding whether he should pitch a cutter, or a cutter

…Cabrera steals home.

…Jansen, busy considering something, does not notice.

…Jansen, startled, throws the ball far, far away from AJ Ellis.

…AJ Ellis pretends to make the play at home.

…Home Plate Ump is convinced, calls Cabrera out.

…Everyone notices the ball is not in AJ’s glove. It’s at the backstop.

…Second Padres player scores when Jansen does not cover home plate in time.

Dodgers lose 7-6. I’m going to bed.

Well. That ball was crushed. Cespedes destroyed that pitch. This was another game that, despite a great performance by a pitcher (in this case 2011 NL Cy Young Winner Clayton Kershaw), the Dodgers’ offense just could not be found. At this point, I’m starting to get a bit worried because it’s been a long while since we’ve seen anything all that impressive or exciting.

Part of the problem, people are quick to point out, is that Don Mattingly is quick to bunt. If a Dodger squares up to bunt, twitter and message boards light up with groans, gnashing of teeth, and choice swear words. This time, Dee Gordon laid down a fantastic bunt in the top of the ninth. The only problem is that Inge made a great play and Matt Treanor is really, very slow. No pinch runner? Well, the bench is also really, very slow (also that whole unwilling to switch out catchers thing).

The biggest problem was really Uribe’s defensive gaffe in the bottom of the 9th. He should not have come off 3rd base because now there is no one to throw to. It was the right play but the wrong move by Uribe.

Interleague play continues (joy) in Anaheim (which is, you know, not Los Angeles) against the red hot Angels.

Let me put it this way: The Proposal, a really basic romantic comedy, was on during the game. I decided to watch Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock instead of watch the game. That is how much I loathe Interleague. I mean, Brandon McCarthy is good and internet hilarious, which I appreciate. But at the same time, a Kemp-less offense is not fun to watch. A Kemp-less offense that starts Adam Kennedy is even LESS fun to watch. Add Aaron Harang to the mix? Walking eight dudes in 3 2/3 innings? Seriously?

Pass the popcorn, buddy. Let’s watch some awesome rom-com hilarity.

So, Clayton Kershaw hasn’t really passed the eyeball test this year in dominance. Sure, he seems to have the same stuff as last year, but he doesn’t seem to be getting the job done in the same way. Frankly, it’s kind of annoying, because the Giants continue to creep up (seriously, is there a team more annoying in the NL? No, I don’t think so.).

Thankfully for Kersh, some other pitcher (Matt Thornton) was less than effective and allowed James “I am the slowest runner on Earth” Loney to score from third on a wild pitch.

The hero of the day, though, was clearly career minor leaguer Elian Herrera. Herrera continues to produce and honestly, I would be happy if he remained on the roster as Mark Ellis’ replacement. In fact, I would be even happier if say, Adam Kennedy got DFA’d and Herrera got to stick around. I’m not the biggest believer in the sudden appearance of the ability to produce in career minor leaguers, but then again, AJ Ellis exists, so maybe the Dodgers just have the corner on the “we thought you were going to be in AAA forever, but apparently you’re pretty good” market.

I still eagerly await the return of Matt “It’s Not Even His Birthday” Kemp, but this Dodgers squad continues to somehow produce despite his absence and Andre Ethier not doing much, either.

I’m not the biggest fan of interleague mostly because I think it can be really detrimental to the standings that actually matter. You know, divisional standings? I’d rather have more games against the Giants or the Padres or even the Rockies. I understand the appeal of the Freeway Series, sure – two SoCal teams in the Los Angeles area (kind of) that both have “Los Angeles” in their name. Fine, I get it. But Anaheim is to Los Angeles like New Jersey is to New York. I’m actually reminded of Ted Mosby’s opinion of New Jersey.

Anyway, this game was something of an emotional roller coaster ride. Both teams nibbled away at each other, though admittedly it was mostly the Dodgers nibbling. See, the Dodgers scored their runs but then they also turned around and gnawed at themselves and made some boneheaded defensive plays.

I don’t know why Don Mattingly continues to start Adam Kennedy. I suppose he has to, and any decision regarding Kennedy’s status on the team will come from over Mattingly’s head (I’m looking at you, Colletti). While I don’t see Kennedy as a harbinger of the apocalypse as some Dodgers fans I associate with seem to, I do agree that is may be past time to find another option from the farm system while Mark Ellis (fingers crossed) recovers.

Anyway, in the bottom of the 8th, Dee Gordon got things started with a single. He then stole (and was called safe on a disputed call) on a 2-0 count (which my boyfriend thought was dumb, since there were 2 outs). AJ Ellis, King of the Walks, walked. Andre Ethier, bless his new fatty fat wallet, smoked a single into right field. And THEN, Juan Rivera, who has recently returned from the disabled list and generally speaking, has not inspired too much confidence with his performance, hit the ball into the Pavilion.

And just like that, 5-2 Dodgers.

Jerome Williams, oddly enough, was not lifted when Dre came up to bat. He was not lifted when Rivera came up to bat. He looked crushed in the dugout.

Mike Trout, who is really really really good at baseball, was 0-4 tonight.

The Dodgers are first to 40 wins.

Although this won’t make up for losing to the Phillies two NLCS series in a row, man, does it feel good. I mean, most of the regular players are on the DL, but WHATEVER. I’ll take what I can get.

James Loney hit the ball well, Elian Herrera continued to be really good, and Andre Ethier busted his slump with a screamer down the 1st base line that Mayberry ended up booting behind him. The hit was initially ruled an error, though the scorer changed it to a double later in the game.

Shawn Tolleson, one of the best relievers in the Dodgers’ farm system for the past year and a half, made his MLB debut in the 9th after the Dodgers increased their lead from 4-3 to 8-3 in the 8th inning. Tolleson’s best pitch is his cutter, so naturally, he didn’t throw it all today. He threw 10 pitches, 8 of the balls, good for two walks. He was quickly lifted in favor of Ronald Belisario, who shut the door (jello jiggling, butter getting cold, etc.).

The Internet was very excited that Tolleson got to pitch in the game, but was somewhat ambivalent about getting lifted so early.

Another farm player may get a chance to play soon, as AJ Ellis was reportedly still hobbling about after getting hit by a pitch. This may mean that Matt Treanor will become the starting catcher. He’s been doing well but it’s been in spot starts, so who knows how that would turn out if he had to play closer to every day.

Cliff Lee is very, very, very good at pitching. He demonstrated that fact today, fanning 12 batters through 7 2/3 innings. Chad Billingsley is also pretty good at pitching, depending on who you ask and depending on what time you ask it. He was very, very good today, allowing only 1 run while striking out 3. You can count me among Chad’s fans (what can I say, I love the drop and drive) but his performance thus far this season has been somewhat…infuriating.

Not, however, as infuriating as some people find Don Mattingly’s penchant for small ball. Tonight, in the 8th inning, the first two baserunners of the inning, Matt Treanor and Tony Gwynn, Jr., were thrown out at 3rd. Gwynn was gunned down by a particularly great throw by Hunter Pence in right field. However, Matt Treanor was thrown out at third after Tony Gwynn bunted to the 3rd base side. Bunting as a concept has not been greeted kindly by Dodger fans as of late, and because Treanor was thrown out as a result of one, people were seemingly irate. Here’s the thing, though: Treanor got an inarguably awful jump from 2nd. He was still around 2nd base when the ball left Gwynn’s bat, and gritty as he may be, Treanor isn’t going to be winning any races.

The worst part is that when Dee Gordon singled to right field to move Gwynn over (and subsequently get him thrown out), people believed that if Treanor had not run on the bunt attempt and stayed put on 2nd, then he could have scored on Dee’s single. Because apparently, and this is important, Matt Treanor would be able to go from 2nd to home faster than Tony Gwynn with a good jump can go from 1st to 3rd.

I don’t presume to know everything about baseball, nor do I really understand the nuances and intricacies of small ball. However, I do know that if you have a terrible jump off the bag on a play that has its entire success predicated on the fact that you are already running where you need to be, then you’re probably going to fail, and fail hard. Yes, a truly successful bunt would have been up the first baseline. Barring some major defensive errors, Gwynn would not reach 1st in this scenario and it’s likely that the Dodgers would have put up more runs in the 8th inning. But sometimes, I think people are already pre-inclined to hate bunting without really looking beyond the fact that someone is showing bunt in the batter’s box.

But that’s just my opinion; I could be wrong.

***

The Dodgers have a chance to sweep the Phillies in their game tomorrow, rebounding from several losses to both the Milwaukee Brewers and division rivals Colorado Rockies.

In case you were curious, the first year player draft is on. If you want more information, follow Brandon Lennox’s awesome coverage over at True Blue LA.

If you don’t know how to react to these signings, here are some tried and true methods for any Dodger fan:

1. State that the draft pick is clearly a punt.
2. State that the draft pick is going to cost too much.
3. Question Logan White’s grasp on reality, because he drafted a college reliever/high school pitcher/position player.
4. Wonder why the Dodgers took X player when Y was still on the board, and man, Keith Law REALLY likes Y.

Put these in any order that you like, and you’ll be golden.

I’ll be honest: the game was so bad today that I actually forgot to write something right after it ended.

So what went wrong? Hard to tell, as it may have been a perfect storm of bad. Capuano was charged with 4 runs, but three runs were the results of errors. Despite his size, Scott Van Slyke was not fielding first base very well. In a slightly bizarre change, Ivan De Jesus was playing 3rd base, while Jerry Hairston was pushed over to 2nd. And then, Hairston was pushed over to SS to replace Dee Gordon. But no one was really able to hit anything except for Alex Castellanos, who had a triple for his first MLB hit.

The Dodgers lost 13-3. It was rough. Tomorrow is a new day, but it’s Harang in Coors, so I’m not…excited.