ESPN and the Boston Globe report that the Red Sox are closing in (get it?) on a deal that would bring Pittsburgh Pirates closer Joel Hanrahan to Boston for prosepcts Stolmy Pimental and Jerry Sands.  The Globe adds that the Pirates initially wanted the heavily-touted Jose Iglesias as part of the deal, but that Boston wouldn’t budge.  That’s not too surprising given that Stephen Drew only has a one-year contract – but it seems like the Sox are really counting on Iglesias getting his hitting together in the minors this year so that they can call him a viable option at shortstop in time for the free-agent market to open up again next year.

Cody Ross and David Ortiz (credit: Amanda Laws)

The Hanrahan trade also, obviously, leaves Andrew Bailey’s future up in the air.  Not that he had much of a chance to wow the organization last year after spending most of it on the DL following his time in Oakland.

For what it’s worth, Hanrahan should be fine.  He notched 36 saves last year, but it took him 63 appearances to do so.  And, he has a 3.74 lifetime ERA.  The closer market’s not great this year, and at the very least, this moves up the entire bullpen without sacrificing much equity.

Also, Cody Ross is officially an Arizona Diamondback.  He had some interesting comments to the media on the way out of town.  The Globe quotes Ross, talking about the Red Sox’s efforts to keep him on the roster:

“I don’t know what happened but we could never agree on terms. They thought I’d come back no matter what because they thought I loved playing there. And I did. Who wouldn’t love playing at Fenway Park? I just wanted a fair deal. I told them what I wanted. I wasn’t trying to break the bank. They weren’t willing to do it.”

That’s polite, but kind of a damning and insightful thing to say.  The Red Sox do tend to ask their stars to re-sign at a deficit, because their stars (until lately, anyway) loved playing in Boston.  The fact that Ross couldn’t be convinced to sign at a lower value just because he “loved” playing at Fenway is kind of a big deal to me.  The bubbles that start the boil, maybe.  I wouldn’t be surprised at all if the Sox have trouble hanging on to their marquee players from here on out.

Which gives us a nice segue into Ross’s other comment, on ex-manager Bobby Valentine.  Ross alluded that he got along with Valentine better than any other player on the team.  “When Bobby came in,” Ross told the Globe, “his way of doing things was a lot different than what they were used to under Terry Francona and it was a shock to them. They weren’t on board with it.”

Also, Ben Cherington is officially Not Talking About Mike Napoli.  This should end well.

John Farrell (Photo by: james_in_to courtesy of Flickr.com)

The Red Sox finally got their wish. John Farrell has been named as their next manager, joining the team for the 2013 season after the failed Valentine Experiment. Well, hopefully he has more than 69 wins in him for next year because I’m not sure I could handle another season like that.

Farrell, who still had one year left on his contract with the Blue Jays, has signed a multi-year deal with the Sox and the official announcement should come on Monday. The Red Sox had to give up short stop Mike Aviles to get the deal done but I think I can live with that…as long as Farrell doesn’t suck as badly as Valentine did.

The Sox interviewed four other candidates, but evidently that was all a ruse. Did anyone thing they weren’t going to hire John Farrell? You can almost see the drool running down the owners’ chins when someone just mentions his name. He has obviously been their first choice forever.

One part of me is happy they got someone hired before the post season was over… but the other part of me is scared. Let’s hope his lack of success with the Blue Jays was more a result of a not-so-great roster and less an indication of his managing skills. And after last year’s fiasco, I think we all have the right to be a little nervous.

Word on the street is Farrell is a hard ass who’s not going to take any shit from this group of players — many of whom he has coached in the past. But can he manage to get this dreadful pitching staff and the rest of this indignant group of babies back on track? That remains to be seen.

What are your thoughts on the newly appointed manager? Would he have been your first choice?

While the MLB Post Season is chugging along yet again without the presence of our beloved (although maybe not this year) Red Sox, they are busy with other important business. The Sox brass is currently in search of a new manager after they fired that lunatic, Bobby Valentine, after a miserable inaugural season at the helm.

If you ask me, they could hire Elmer Fudd and he would do a better job keeping this team on track. And he probably would garner more respect from the players than Valentine did… at least he has more motivation. You know, it does take a lot of concentration, strategy and tenacity to catch that wascally wabbit.

The Red Sox have a short but promising list of possible candidates for the recently vacated skipper position.

• Tim Wallach is the 55-year-old third base coach for the LA Dodgers. Wallach is a former third baseman who played for the LA Dodgers, Montreal Expos and California Angels from 1980 to 1996. He won three Gold Gloves, two Silver Slugger Awards and was a five-time All-Star. Tim has spent his post-playing years with the Dodgers as their hitting coach, Triple-A Albuquerque Isotopes manager, and his most recent position as third base coach.

• Tony Pena is the 55-year-old bench coach for the NY Yankees. Pena is a former catcher who spent 17 years in the majors with the Pittsburgh Pirates, St. Louis Cardinals, Red Sox, Cleveland Indians, Chicago White Sox and Houston Astros. This five-time All-Star and four-time Gold Glove winner also won Manager of the Year with the KC Royals. Pena also won a World Series in 2009 as a member of the Yankees coaching staff.

• DeMarlo Hale is the 51-year-old third base coach for the Baltimore Orioles, and former Red Sox third base coach under Terry Francona. Hale is a former minor league first baseman and outfielder who played part of four seasons for the Boston Red Sox and Oakland A’s between 1984 and 1988. He also spent nine seasons managing in the minor leagues before signing on with the Sox before the 2006 season.

• Brad Ausmus, the youngest of the candidates at 43, currently works as a special assistant in the San Diego Padres’ front office. The New England-born Ausmus spent his 18-year career with the San Diego Padres, Detroit Tigers, Houston Astros and LA Dodgers. This catcher was a three-time Gold Glove winner lead the league five times in fielding percentage.

• John Farrell is the 50-year-old manager of the Toronto Blue Jays and former starting pitcher for the Cleveland Indians, California Angels and Detroit Tigers between 1987 and 1996. While it’s not certain Farrell will leave the Blue Jays prior to the completion of his contract, it’s been rumored that the Sox front office is hot to trot for this guy and willing to give up the farm to get him. Not sure I agree since the former Red Sox pitching coach has yet to manage the Jays to a winning season. But the players supposedly like him and after the debacle this past season, that seems to be an important piece to the puzzle.

I haven’t decided yet on who I would hire for this position but I do know it would be whoever can best handle a group of grown men who act like first graders if they don’t get their way. I’m leaning toward Tony Pena…

Who do you like for the job?

The 2012 season, may it rest in peace, was by far the worst I can remember being a witness to in a very long time. I’m sort of really tired of talking about just how much it did suck so this will be my last post about the miserableness of the last six months. I hope. I vow to now look forward to 2013 and what kind of magical rabbits the Sox brass will pull out of the hat to make sure “last place” are words I never have to utter (or type, for that matter) next season.

So here’s my short recap, Clint-style:

The Good

• Not much.
• Big Papi’s resurgence pre-injury. He was by far the most consistent force on the team for the 90 games he participated in. Playing for a contract will do that for you.
• The Red Sox pulling a fast one on the LA Dodgers and unloading $250 million in payroll.
• Not having to worry about Theo being there to spend that extra $250 million all in one place.
• The introduction of Will Middlebrooks. Hi, Will!

The Bad

• Everything.
• Injuries, injuries, injuries. The Sox used a record 56 players over the season.
• Just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse — having a September almost identical to the colossal collapse of September of 2011.
• Bobby Valentine’s mismanagement of every aspect of the team and the player’s lack of respect for him.
• The injury ending Will Middlebrooks’ promising season. Bye, Will!

The Ugly

• Finishing last place in the division with a 69-93.
• The players’ whiny bitch attitude over the decisions of their new manager.
• Struggling starting rotation with not one pitcher having more than 11 wins.
• Will Middlebrooks going down with an injury just six weeks after Kevin Youkilis is traded leaving the team floundering for a third baseman.
• Bobby Valentine being a total fruitcake… enough said.

And that, my friends, concludes my recap of the 2012 Boston Red Sox season — one which makes me long for short-term memory loss so I never have to think about it again.

Not even this disguise will get him back in the Red Sox dugout.

Welp, we all knew it was coming. The Red Sox fired manager, Bobby Valentine, after just one season at the helm. Honestly, if the Sox didn’t fire Bobby, I’m not sure I would be able to watch next season. Needless to say, I’m not sad to see him go. I may have actually done a little happy dance when I heard the news.

The Red Sox were nothing short of horrific this season finishing in the AL East basement, a dismal 26 games behind the division champion, Yankees. Their record of 69-93 was the worst since 1965.

Although Valentine was not the first choice for rookie GM, Ben Cherington, he didn’t place all the blame on the manager.

“Our 2012 season was disappointing for many reasons,” general manager Ben Cherington said in the team’s announcement. “No single issue is the reason, and no single individual is to blame. We’ve been making personnel changes since August, and we will continue to do so as we build a contending club. With an historic number of injuries, Bobby was dealt a difficult hand. He did the best he could under seriously adverse circumstances, and I am thankful to him.”

I’m glad that Ben said some nice words for Bobby as he sent him packing. I can’t seem to muster one positive comment to describe what went on for the past six months. From the record number of injuries, to the discontent in the club house, to the manager’s borderline basket case-style diarrhea of the mouth, the whole season was sickening to watch.

I’m glad it’s over and I look forward to the next chapter. Hopefully 2013 brings us a manager that studied under the Bill Belichick School of Verbal Constipation. And also maybe a reinvigorated roster with heart and a desire to actually play baseball.

Sayonara, Bobby… don’t let the door hit you in the ass…

I mean…

Granted, the Red Sox didn’t exactly put their best lineup on the field yesterday.  Dustin Pedroia sat out with what was later reported to be a fractured finger (he won’t go on the DL, since there’s only two games left), and Jacoby Ellsbury also didn’t make an appearance.  I’m not making excuses for the Red Sox, but let’s be honest: when Ryan Lavarnway (currently batting somewhere in the .160s) is your fifth hitter, and three-hitter Cody Ross is the biggest threat in your batting order, you’ve gone off the reservation somehow.

Regardless of whether the Sox were either flopping around in the bottom of the fishing boat, or just giving their exciting up-and-comers a chance to play, last night’s game against the Yankees was the most one-sided rivalry game I’ve seen in a long time.  Clay Buchholz imploded in the second inning, giving up eight runs in a nine-run frame that decided the game early and sent a disinterested fan base packing for yet another depressing night.

Robinson Cano started the second-inning barrage off for New York, launching a solo home run to center field.  Buchholz got Mark Teixeria to strike out, but the unflappable Nick Swisher glanced a double off of center field with one out.  Curtis Granderson scored Swisher by hitting a home run of his own, and then Russell Martin promptly hit another home run, making the score 4-0.

Undaunted, Buchholz announced himself with authority by walking Eric Chavez and Derek Jeter, and loaded the bases via an Ichiro Suzuki single.  Alex Rodriguez sacrificed Chavez home for the second out, before Cano used his second at-bat of the inning to double home Jeter and Suzuki.

With the score 7-0 with two outs, Bobby Valentine had finally seen enough.  Alfredo Aceves replaced Buchholz.  Aceves faced Teixeira first, and Teixeira (of course) hit the Yankees’ fourth home run of the inning, scoring Cano and leaving the score at 9-0.  Swisher followed up with another double, but Aceves finally got Granderson to ground out to first to end the inning.

The Sox didn’t really get any kind of offensive rally going.  They scored a couple of baserunners here and there, care a well-executed Jarrod Saltalamacchia sac fly and a Daniel Nava home run; but there was really nothing happening at all at the plate.

With the win, coupled with Baltimore’s loss to Tampa, the Yankees took sole possession of first place with two games to play.  The Red Sox’ best-case scenario now is to play spoiler for either the Yankees or the Orioles, as both teams continue to battle for the division title.  That’s literally about all that Red Sox fans can look forward to – an exciting game 162 that means nothing for the Sox, but could potentially affect another team’s postseason. Blah.

Here’ a link to last night’s box score, courtesy of the Red Sox.  Tonight’s game 161 pits Jon Lester (9-14, 4.94 ERA) against David Phelps (4-4, 3.34 ERA).  Phelps replaces the beleaguered Ivan Nova in a start that will probably decide Phelps’ prominence on the Yankees’ postseason roster.

I’m not going to lie… I’ve been rooting for the Orioles the past two games. I don’t remember ever doing that but since I have nothing to live root for this season, I’ll try and give the O’s a boost. The Red Sox nearly foiled the O’s extra-inning win streak yesterday, but I just knew if a team was going to end that streak this year, it most certainly was NOT going to be this Sox team.

The game on Friday night was a trip on the train to Dullsville. Jon Lester pitched just so-so, allowing four earned runs on eight hits over seven innings. Not horrible. Not fantastic. Just… meh. The offense was a bit sluggish scoring just two runs on eight hits and only scoring two of the seven runners who made it into scoring position. In the end, the O’s beat the Sox 4-2 in a brisk (for the Red Sox) three hour game. The yawn-inducing box score can be found here, courtesy of the Sox.

Saturday’s game offered a bit more excitement which I was glad for since I had some family making the trek down to Fenway. The Sox and O’s seesawed back and forth in this one, each team answering the other’s scoring until the sixth inning. I’ll take the blame for the go ahead runs in the sixth — I happened to text my cousin (who was there) and may have made mention that at least the Red Sox weren’t losing. And then boom… the O’s go ahead by three. Ooops.

But then, in the bottom of the seventh, the Sox mounted a comeback. Scott Podsednik doubled, Pedro Ciriaco followed with a walk and Dustin Pedroia singled to load the bases with no outs. Cody Ross and Ryan Lavarnway both grounded out but each drove in a run to bring the Sox within one. Not the most exciting way to get the runs home but it works.

In the bottom of the eighth, the Sox tied up the game on back-to-back two-out doubles by Daniel Nava and Scott Podsednik. And the bullpen even looked to be in the mood to pitch too — Craig Breslow, Junichi Tazawa, Andrew Bailey and Mark Melancon pitched scoreless eighth, ninth, tenth and eleventh innings.

And then there was Alfredo Aceves. I wonder what happened to Alfredo sauce. He pitched pretty well early in the season. I mean he does have 25 saves this season. But something changed. Maybe it was triggered by his run-in with Bobby Valentine in August that has turned his arm to crap. Whatever it was, he now sucks and like Dice K, he shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near that pitcher’s mound. I’m sure when the O’s saw Aceves take the mound, the all nodded their heads because they knew that extra-inning win streak was not in danger.

When all was said and done, Aceves gave up three runs on three hits in the top of the 12th inning giving the O’s a 9-6 win and keeping the streak in tact. There’s four hours and fourteen minutes I’ll never get back. Click here for the box score, courtesy of the Sox.

The Sox and O’s finish up the series today — this season can’t be over soon enough. Really. Felix Doubront takes the hill against Chris Tillman. With a win today, the Sox will officially have a better September record than they did in 2011. Sad, I know.

Sure, now you get hot! (c/o Keith Allson, via flickr)

Normally a Red Sox win would send me straight to the computer to happily regale you with all the awesome stuff that happened in the game. But when your team is 14 games under .500 and has been officially eliminated from post-season play, it gets tough to want to write about anything — even a win.

Something needs to happen soon to shake this team up or people are going to start using my blog posts as a cure for their insomnia. I nod off sometimes just writing this crap. I’ve been waiting on the edge of my seat for the hammer to finally drop on Bobby Valentine, but it looks like I’ll have to wait until October for that nugget of happiness to come my way.

So in the meantime, I’ll have to continue to tell you about a win (they beat the Rays 5-2, by the way) that means nothing except that it gets them closer to getting out of the basement. I just don’t think I can live through the off season if this team finishes in last place!

Jacoby Ellsbury appears to be peaking at the wrong time. What happened a couple months ago when… oh, I don’t know… that production would’ve been a big help when the wildcard was still in reach? But then again, that question pertains to quite a few members of this team. They never could get in sync.

Oh well, maybe next year. Or the year after.

If you’re still following this train wreck, click here for the box score. I promise I’ll try to be more upbeat about the next win. If there is one. I sort of feel like Eyore right now.

Congratulations, PawSox!!

After a dismal series with the Yankees where the Red Sox lost two of the three games, putting their September record at paltry 2-9 as of Thursday, I was just desperate for some good news. Anything that will make me smile and think the season isn’t a total loss… even though it really is…

Good News Nugget #1:
Thursday night, while the Boston Red Sox were doing their usual sucking, the AAA Pawtucket Red Sox were busy winning the International Leagues’ Championship, taking home the Governor’s Cup for the first time since 1984. With all the player movement between AA, AAA and the Show this season, it’s a wonder the PawSox could put together a team cohesive enough to pull this off. But they did… somehow.

I’ll give credit to team manager, Arnie Beyeler, for keeping this team on track. This is Arnie’s sixth season managing in the Red Sox organization. He spent four season in Portland and this is his second year with Pawtucket. Maybe it’s time for Arnie to get called up to the Show as well… seriously, he can’t be any worse than Bobby Valentine.

Good News Nugget #2:
Congratulations to the Pedroia family on the birth of their second son Thursday morning. The look on Dustin’s face during Wednesday night’s game when Bobby V. took him out of the game telling him his wife went into labor was priceless. He looked scared to death. Mother and baby are doing just fine and Pedroia is expected to rejoin the team this weekend in Toronto.

Good News Nugget #3:
Holy crap, the Red Sox beat the Blue Jays last night, 8-5 to snap a six-game losing streak against the Jays. They scored three runs in the top of the ninth to break a 5-5 tie on singles by Jacoby Ellsbury and Cody Ross, followed by a two-run triple by Mauro Gomez. Ryan Lavarnway finished off the scoring with a sac fly and Andrew Bailey came in for the save.

Click here for the box score, courtesy of the Red Sox. The Sox and Jays meet again this afternoon with Clay Buchholz still searching for his first win since August 16th.

Good News Nugget #4:
Ok… this made me laugh because as it turns out, Josh Beckett can’t even pretend to hustle with his new team. In the game Thursday night between the Dodgers and Cardinals, Beckett singled to right field, but basically jogged to first base and ended up getting thrown out by right fielder, Carlos Beltran. Embarrassing… Click here to watch it and giggle!

Hey… the good news has been hard to come by this season so I’m clinging to anything that shows life in this organization. As pissed as I am at them right now, I’m still rooting for them to be successful in the future. Without Bobby Valentine.

The only emotion I seem to be feeling these days when it comes time to write about the Red Sox is dread. Someone actually offered me tickets to see the Sox and Blue Jays play Sunday at Fenway and I turned them down. I believe my exact words were, “The Red Sox are dead to me.”

I realize that this team, no matter how much they piss me off, could never be completely out of my life, but right now, I’d like to just pretend they don’t exist. I would like to borrow Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak and toss it over the whole organization.

The Red Sox ended their nine-game West Coast swing with a big, fat 2-1 loss, giving them a 1-8 record for the trip. This loss especially sucks for Aaron Cook who pitched a good game, giving up just two runs on seven hits and striking out five in six innings. That line wins most days.

Too bad the offense couldn’t get the poor guy some support. They were just plain pitiful, scoring just one run on five hits. Cody Ross was the only player who actually showed up to play last night, going 3-for-4 with the lone RBI.

I refuse to link the box score. You’re welcome.

As if the miserable road trip wasn’t enough, the Red Sox also seem to have a manager on the verge of a complete meltdown. Bobby Valentine has been know for saying crap to the media that makes little to no sense at all. He tries to be sarcastic but comes off sounding rude and irrational. In a radio interview on Wednesday with WEEI’s Glen Ordway, Bobby responded to a question from Ordway about “checking out” on this season by telling his him, “I’d punch you right in the mouth.” And that was just the start of his rant on the radio… click here to here the complete interview. Bobby V hasn’t just gone off the deep end… he has performed a triple lindy off the deep end.