Let’s face it: We aren’t going to know how this year’s draft picks pan out for quite some time. Tampa Bay’s first pick, RHP Taylor Guerrieri, broke his silence today and said he is still “very committed” to the University of South Carolina.
So while the baseball end of things are up in the air, there are a few things I’m willing to judge just two days after the Rays finished their 2011 First-Year Player Draft. Things like the best name in the group, worst facial hair and most likely to elicit a crush from yours truly.
Best Baseball Name
Shortstop Jake Hager. I like classic, strong names when it comes to the game of baseball. Something that would lend itself to a chant when you’re down in the bottom of the ninth, with two outs and the bases loaded. “Jake” fits that bill. And his full name would sound great over a P.A. system.
Watch Jake hit a triple while wearing a horrendous uniform:
Best Nickname Potential
Granden Goetzman (75th overall pick). The centerfielder’s first name already has the word Grand in it. And Goetzman? Drop the Goet, add in G.O.A.T. (Greatest of All Time) and we’re good to go in the nickname department. Yes, I know that his name is pronounced Getz-man, but I am not above pronouncing G.O.A.T. like get for the sake of a nickname or a good poster board sign.
Potential Hometown Hero
Goetzman already wants this title. But folks in the Bay area may also be pulling for the 900th overall pick Jonathan Koscso out of University of South Florida or the 1290th overall pick Michael Bourdon who attended the University of Tampa.
Best Long-Hair Potential
Since Joe Maddon is allowing the Rays to grow out their hair this season, I took a look through ALL of the 2011 draft picks to see who would be most likely to go with the look of lengthy locks if Maddon’s rule is still in existence 3-5 years from now.
The winners are Lenny Linsky and RHP Andy Bass. Linsky grew his hair out a bit at Hawaii and he’s from Rancho Palos Verdes, California which is near Long Beach. (Thanks Google Maps!) For the sake of aiding this long-hair argument, I’m going to tell myself that Linksy is a surfer.
Now on to Bass. This guy has serious Bieber-swoop potential. Don’t believe me? Please check out his photo from the 2011 Davidson College baseball roster.
Name Most Likely to Drive Spellcheck Crazy
Theron Geith. While there are more difficult names to spell, Microsoft Word gives an angry red scribble under this kid’s first AND last name. The same goes for Granden Goetzman, but I like to spread the Draft Awards love around.
This is a toss up between second baseman Raymond Church and baby-faced shortstop Johnny Eirman.
Worst Facial Hair
RHP Charles Cononie. Please, shave that ‘stache. It competes with Matt Garza’s chin adornment in all the worst ways.
Most Likely to Make Me Feel Like a Cougar
Before I answer this one let me give a little background: I’m not very far out of college myself, but I feel cougar-y any time I like a guy who is as young or younger than my little sister who will be 21 later this summer.
Lenny Linksy or outfielder Kes Carter could therefore grant me cougar status. Linksy could steal my heart if he really is a surfer boy. I grew up on the east coast of Florida and there’s still something about a guy with a surf board that warrants a second look.
And Carter? I fall into that “women love accents” stereotype and I imagine that he has a spectacular southern drawl. Plus, his first name is Kes. Come on. All of us ladies need to date a guy with that kind of name at least once in our life, right?