Dear TNT and the Makers of Law & Order:
Tonight, I turned on the television to TNT, which I assume is short for “Turner Network Tnetennba”, to watch one of my favorite shows, Law & Order. I was highly disappointed by what I saw.
Tonight’s episode “Reds vs. Giants” was the worst episode of Law and Order that I have ever seen in my life.
For one, I recognized right away that it was one of those gimmick episodes that tries to cross-promote shows on the same network by switching casts of characters. I have no idea what television program these characters were supposedly from, but this was obviously a terrible idea. Clearly, these characters were from a sports-based show, which does not mesh well with Law and Order’s procedural format, and moreover, they were ludicrous. The handsome, soft-spoken, good-at-everything Canadian, Joey Votto? What’s the point of a character who never makes a single mistake and is better than everyone at everything in the world? If you want a character to be relatable, don’t make him go 3-4 with two runs scored. Or the friendly, easy-going Ryan Ludwick. A guy going 2-3 with a HR is just too much skill for a convincing TV character.
Second of all, there was no conflict to this story. It was obvious from the very beginning that lead prosecutor Bronson Arroyo would give all those Giants fellas what they deserved. Where’s the fun in the story if one side only gets two hits, and is completely shut down by the opposition? It was easy to root for Arroyo, given his background, and his flowing, blond mane, and his double-ear-beflapped helmet, but it’s really only fulfilling if we get to see him develop and overcome adversity for even a little bit. There was no adversity here! Just a seven inning postseason outing with only 2 baserunners!
Lastly, the right fielding character, Hunter Pence? That beard should not be allowed on television.
I really hope that this episode of Law & Order is never aired on TNT again. Thank you for your time
Sincerely,
A Concerned Fan
P.S. Oh, gods of baseball karma, please don’t take this too seriously. It is clearly satire. Amen.
