With the Reds, I mean.
There’s little-to-know Cubs “news” this morning, as Carl hogged it all yesterday. Lo, as I was scouring the interwebs for anything Cubs-related that I could use this morning, I came across this question over at the Chicago Tribune:
And it got me thinking about how far my sour grapes go, if I’m being unfair, and whether ill-wishing another team further serves to curse my own.
I came to this conclusion: No, I really don’t want to see Dusty Baker win a World Series with the Reds. Granted, this is probably due in equal part my disdain for Reds fans (and people from Cincinnati in general), as it does with Dusty.
And so, lest you think my desire to see Dusty fail on a spectacular scale is due to the inherent racism in Chicago Cubs fans, which Dusty brought up early and often on his way out the door of 1060 West Addison, here are the Top Ten Reason I Don’t Want Dusty To Win A World Series:
10. Has a convicted shoplifter on his current team.
9. His refusal to move Sammy down in the lineup without Sammy’s approval.
8. Allegations of racism on the part of Cubs fans following his comment that black people handle the heat better than white people.
7. The toothpicks, my GOD, the toothpicks.
6. Kerry Wood’s arm.
5. Darrin Baker being a batboy at AGE THREE (thanks again, J.T. Snow). Honestly, if you’ve ever had a 3-year old, it’s obvious why this was a spectacularly bad idea.
4. Mark Prior’s arm.
3. Neifi Perez
2. Bringing Darrin into post-game press-conferences so the media can’t ask him any hard questions; AND
1. His failure to yank a rookie pitcher when his world is crumbling around him. I think we all know of what I speak.
So what about you? Do YOU want to see Dusty win a World Series with the Reds?